Here's a quick story: Guy likes Girl. Guy asks Girl out. Guy starts to develop a relationship with Girl. Girl says she has never been treated so well and loves spending time with Guy, but then says she doesn't want to further the relationship. Girl then goes out with Hot/Rich Guy and gets her heart broken, or worse, gets married to Hot/Rich Guy and then gets divorced a few years later. I know it sounds like a stereotype, but it has happened to me more times than I would like to admit. For a while, I thought I was doing something extremely wrong and tried everything I could think of the make things work, but the same scenario kept playing out. Then I started talking to a lot of my friends who have had similar things happen to them. They all told me the exact same story. So why does this keep happening?
I have a circle of guy friends that are all very sweet, caring, spiritual, fun guys who know how to treat women well. And yet they are all single and keep getting rejected by girls. We often sit around and talk about relationship stuff, but none of us can figure out why it never works out. Why is it that girls always say they are looking for guys like us, but then end up with jerks that treat them like crap? I am not saying all "hot" guys or rich guys are jerks, but there is a reason it is a stereotype. If a guy is most interested in building himself up, he usually doesn't make time for anything or anyone else.
I started thinking about the possibility that maybe I am asking out superficial women. I will admit that I have asked out girls based solely on looks a time or two. However, many of the girls I have gone out with are very intelligent, fun, and caring girls. So why did these girls reject me and then go out with some egotistical douche? I don't get it. What's worse, I have asked out girls that I wasn't even really interested in just because my bishop said the girl had talked to him about how she never gets asked out - and then she turned me down for a date. This has happened a few times. It turns out the girl wasn't complaining that she never gets asked out, she was complaining that she never gets asked out by "Hunky Joe".
People always tell me that eventually I will find a girl who appreciates how I treat her and loves me for who I am. Some even tell me that it is a numbers game, and I just have to keep playing. To them I say, I am 28 years old. I have been doing this for over a decade, and I always get the same results. Doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results is the definition of insanity. So apparently, dating=insanity. Actually, I think that is a pretty good description.
So I look at this coming Valentine's Day and think to myself, "what the #@*%?!?!" That's about all I really can do. I have done my duty as a man by asking girls out and treating them well. I put my whole heart into relationships. What more can I do? Like I said in my first post, this blog is a cathartic outlet for me - hence the bitching. I don't really have any answers to my dilemma. At least I have a bunch of friends in the same boat that can lend me support and help me realize that it isn't just me. So I will just continue being the guy I am, treating women well and putting everything I can into my relationships. Maybe someday I really will go insane.
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